"asking the silicon valley tarot": old post from the well, #39, 15 sep 02

Posted on April 9th, 2010 by Scraps.
Categories: Old Posts, Oracles, Words.

My question pondered, carefully rehearsed,
Submitted to an oracle profound.
The Salesman of Cubicles reversed,
The Five of Networks binding all around.

A pause, a click, an inauspicious sound,
It spits a blank. My high-tech fortune's cursed.
If tarot chips won't tell me what they've found,
I'll slink back home, and just assume the worst.

0 comments.

fortune cookies talk back, number whatever

Posted on October 21st, 2009 by Scraps.
Categories: Comedy, Music, Oracles, Words.

Yesterday a got a fortune cookie that said, "Come back later. I am sleeping. (Yes, fortune cookies need their sleep, too.)"

I love the first part. The second, parenthetical part, not so much. It's trying too hard, over-selling the joke.

But it's trying. It's fortune cookies like that that keep me reading them; one out of thirty, seems like these days.

5 comments.

another fine local business

Posted on January 5th, 2008 by Scraps.
Categories: Oracles, Words.

I wish I'd had my camera when I passed the garbage-type truck that had, emblazoned on its side:

EMPIRE DISMANTLING

2 comments.

fortune cookies talk back: fortune of the year thus far

Posted on October 3rd, 2007 by Scraps.
Categories: Oracles, Words.

Here we go. Low fat, whole wheat green tea.

0 comments.

high on the list of things no one else cares about

Posted on September 19th, 2007 by Scraps.
Categories: Boring Posts, Oracles, Words.

The fictional names of spam senders are mostly amusing to the recipient and no one else, inasmuch as everyone has the opportunity to be (briefly) amused by these absurdities in their own overflowing inboxes. So I note almost entirely for my own amusement the email I received today from Grackle L. Pigging.

3 comments.

fortune cookies talk back: ok i get the point already division

Posted on April 25th, 2007 by Scraps.
Categories: Oracles, Words.

Received with lunch today:

Success is an accumulation of successful days

and

Whoever wants to reach a distant goal must take small steps

0 comments.

fortune cookies talk back, odd verb tense division

Posted on February 11th, 2007 by Scraps.
Categories: Oracles, Words.

You will have a fine capacity for the enjoyment of life.

3 comments.

we had an amazing time, but it took forever to get home

Posted on February 3rd, 2007 by Scraps.
Categories: Comedy, Oracles, Words.

Business spotted in Bay Ridge: Homeric Tours.

0 comments.

they've got my number

Posted on July 29th, 2006 by Scraps.
Categories: Oracles, Sports, Words.

Subject line of spam received today:

Better future, well refereed

0 comments.

everywhere a sign

Posted on April 19th, 2006 by Scraps.
Categories: Oracles, Words.

On the side of a van in Park Slope:

Sham Construction

0 comments.

everywhere a sign

Posted on April 1st, 2006 by Scraps.
Categories: Music, Oracles, Words.

Spotted on Seventh Avenue in Park Slope:

"Psychic - One Flight Up. Ring the Psychic Bell."

0 comments.

fortune cookies talk back

Posted on March 24th, 2006 by Scraps.
Categories: Oracles, Words.

When in anger, sing the alphabet.

0 comments.

fortune cookies talk back

Posted on July 21st, 2005 by Scraps.
Categories: Oracles, Words.

Calamity is the touchstone of a brave mind.

0 comments.

fortune cookies talk back, ominous division

Posted on October 9th, 2000 by Scraps.
Categories: Oracles, Words.

Someone can ready your mind.

0 comments.


  • We cannot always control our thoughts, but we can control our words, and repetition impresses the subconscious, and we are then master of the situation.
    - Florence Scovel Shinn